clumsyartist
marionisamuffin:

pleasantandcain:

fromladytolifter:

candidlycara:

dance-in-the-shadows:

gracediamondsfear:

wifeyknowsbest:

whatapreciouslittlefuckfox:


A sense of humor can make everything better. Sex isn’t like it is in the movies or in porn. There will be strange and weird and awkward sounds, there might be a silly interruption like the cat or a kid… you might knock heads or trip getting undressed. Sex is funny, foreplay is funny and sometimes you need to just laugh. It will keep things from getting awkward! If you take sex too seriously you aren’t truly enjoying it!
Not to mention a sense of humor can be really sexy no matter what your gender identity is!

this comic is literally my favorite thing on tumblr.

i’ve always said if you can’t laugh with the person you’re having sex with while you’re having sex with them you shouldn’t be having sex with them.

God.
My husband once walked up behind me while i was sitting in the living room just watching t.v…and he put his penis on my shoulder and said “hello..”
THIS WAS HIS SEDUCTION.
THIS WAS HIS IDEA OF HOW TO GET ME INTO BED.
it worked, but not before I laughed for days.

For that last comment.

I always had a ton of weird funky condoms at my place because I volunteered with Planned Parenthood and did a lot of sex education and sex positive work. I literally had no less than like thirty different types of condoms at a time. So when it came time to grabbing a condom it was a grab bag of WHO KNOWS what you’ll end up with.
Long story short, my boyfriend grabs one, puts it on, heat of the moment type thing, a some point we both look down and see it’s an ELECTRIC GREEN condom. Dead pan he looks me straight in the eye and in his best impression goes “HEY HO. KERMIT DEE FROG HERE.” And I COMPLETELY LOST IT.
On a completely different occasion I said “don’t stop” and he sang ALL of Don’t Stop Believing. All of it. All of it. Right then and there. Without stopping.

Can I add the story about how me and one of my partners had a very enthralling discussion about deserts while I was on top of him?
Or the time my partner’s friends blasted “Eye of the Tiger” through the door and we rocked it out to the beat while quoting the movie?

Story time:
I was with this girl during a trip out to Washington, we’d hung out a few times, and hit it off really well. So we got together one afternoon. Her dorm-mate came home, saw the “Do Not Disturb” sock on her bedroom door and called out “Thrusters to full!”
Not missing a beat the girl and I yelled back “We’re giving it all we’ve got, Captain!” and her roommate started fucking dying outside the door.
Probably should have proposed right on the spot, but whatever.

It got better.

marionisamuffin:

pleasantandcain:

fromladytolifter:

candidlycara:

dance-in-the-shadows:

gracediamondsfear:

wifeyknowsbest:

whatapreciouslittlefuckfox:

A sense of humor can make everything better. Sex isn’t like it is in the movies or in porn. There will be strange and weird and awkward sounds, there might be a silly interruption like the cat or a kid… you might knock heads or trip getting undressed. Sex is funny, foreplay is funny and sometimes you need to just laugh. It will keep things from getting awkward! If you take sex too seriously you aren’t truly enjoying it!

Not to mention a sense of humor can be really sexy no matter what your gender identity is!

this comic is literally my favorite thing on tumblr.

i’ve always said if you can’t laugh with the person you’re having sex with while you’re having sex with them you shouldn’t be having sex with them.

God.

My husband once walked up behind me while i was sitting in the living room just watching t.v…and he put his penis on my shoulder and said “hello..”

THIS WAS HIS SEDUCTION.

THIS WAS HIS IDEA OF HOW TO GET ME INTO BED.

it worked, but not before I laughed for days.

For that last comment.

I always had a ton of weird funky condoms at my place because I volunteered with Planned Parenthood and did a lot of sex education and sex positive work. I literally had no less than like thirty different types of condoms at a time. So when it came time to grabbing a condom it was a grab bag of WHO KNOWS what you’ll end up with.

Long story short, my boyfriend grabs one, puts it on, heat of the moment type thing, a some point we both look down and see it’s an ELECTRIC GREEN condom. Dead pan he looks me straight in the eye and in his best impression goes “HEY HO. KERMIT DEE FROG HERE.” And I COMPLETELY LOST IT.

On a completely different occasion I said “don’t stop” and he sang ALL of Don’t Stop Believing. All of it. All of it. Right then and there. Without stopping.

Can I add the story about how me and one of my partners had a very enthralling discussion about deserts while I was on top of him?

Or the time my partner’s friends blasted “Eye of the Tiger” through the door and we rocked it out to the beat while quoting the movie?

Story time:

I was with this girl during a trip out to Washington, we’d hung out a few times, and hit it off really well. So we got together one afternoon. Her dorm-mate came home, saw the “Do Not Disturb” sock on her bedroom door and called out “Thrusters to full!”

Not missing a beat the girl and I yelled back “We’re giving it all we’ve got, Captain!” and her roommate started fucking dying outside the door.

Probably should have proposed right on the spot, but whatever.

It got better.

superwolffanfics
reblogalert:


boneycircus:


Nicholas Lord, a Navy sailor since 2008 currently on active duty, is under investigation after threatening to rape a young woman who is a Navy recruit.
The young woman posted a photo of herself on Facebook, captioning it to say she’s proud of how she’s working hard to get in shape for the Navy, and she’s excited to be leaving soon. The photo was shared on the page for her Delayed Entry Program for her fellow Navy recruits.
Nicholas Lord, who is not a current recruit and who has been serving in the Navy since 2008, then commented:
You’ll end up pregnant real soon you fucking wh***. If I could and I knew you, I’d hold you down and rape you.
The next day, Lord gloated about his threat on his Facebook page, updating his status to say he’d been “trolling feminist pages.” In case it needs to be said, the Facebook page for a Navy program is not a “feminist page.” It’s a Navy recruiting page. (x) (x)
I don’t know what the Navy’s punishment system is like, but I hope he gets the worst possible. I hope they investigate his past history in the military, too. If he’s bold enough to outright threaten female recruits, under his own name, on public, Navy-run social media, I seriously doubt he hasn’t harassed and threatened female sailors. He may even have raped them.
Especially given the military’s problem with letting men get away with harassment and rape, they need to severely punish him.

Send it viral, and he will see ramifications.

If you only reblog one thing today I hope it’s this.

reblogalert:

boneycircus:

Nicholas Lord, a Navy sailor since 2008 currently on active duty, is under investigation after threatening to rape a young woman who is a Navy recruit.

The young woman posted a photo of herself on Facebook, captioning it to say she’s proud of how she’s working hard to get in shape for the Navy, and she’s excited to be leaving soon. The photo was shared on the page for her Delayed Entry Program for her fellow Navy recruits.

Nicholas Lord, who is not a current recruit and who has been serving in the Navy since 2008, then commented:

You’ll end up pregnant real soon you fucking wh***. If I could and I knew you, I’d hold you down and rape you.

The next day, Lord gloated about his threat on his Facebook page, updating his status to say he’d been “trolling feminist pages.” In case it needs to be said, the Facebook page for a Navy program is not a “feminist page.” It’s a Navy recruiting page. (x) (x)

I don’t know what the Navy’s punishment system is like, but I hope he gets the worst possible. I hope they investigate his past history in the military, too. If he’s bold enough to outright threaten female recruits, under his own name, on public, Navy-run social media, I seriously doubt he hasn’t harassed and threatened female sailors. He may even have raped them.

Especially given the military’s problem with letting men get away with harassment and rape, they need to severely punish him.

Send it viral, and he will see ramifications.

If you only reblog one thing today I hope it’s this.